zine review:
Spank and Friends
This is surely the highlight of my Expozine haul. Spank and Friends is a rare find, not only because its goal is to be humourous–an uncommon enterprise on the zine scene–but also because it actually achieves that goal. In it, “Spank Douglas” and a few friends send e-mails to businesses and aspiring Craigslist merchants, inquiring about their products. However, each e-mail is meticulously designed to be as inane, baffling and outrightly hilarious as possible. Spank tests determined salespeople with obtuse and esoteric questions such as “do u have food that is safe for yuong boy alegric to lupus” and “do they hnave falavours for old people.” Each message is adorned with obviously intentional spelling errors, grammatical indiscretions, and incompetent penmanship, lending the proceedings a sense of tongue-in-cheek absurdism. As if Spank’s e-mails weren’t enough, also included are the clueless customer service reps’ feeble attempts to respond to the inanity. My favourite moment features Spank’s trademark barrage of nearly indecipherable questions: “i wnat do dress my dog oup ina pink out fit im thiniking something with glitter. 1do the dogs like it 2how do iget the shit on 3how do i get the shirt off 4can they ware pants 6what is the bset dog. thank s, spank.” The baffled reply, coming from the doubtlessly confused owner of a custom cookie decorator, is suitably straight-laced: “Dear Spank, We do not make dog clothes.” Label this performance art, cultural subversion, or just flat-out fun, what’s most important is that it’s one of the most engrossing and, in spite of itself, intelligent zines I’ve encountered in recent history. (Michael Tau)
Zine, Issue 1, [email protected], $2