“Could it be that socks are intelligent, perhaps malicious entities? There sure are lots of them…All throughout the world is the sum of billions of socks; a great sock brain, if you will…” So contemplates R.B. Fairchild in his story, “Socks.” The next story deals with the difficult transition from human to super-human. According to Fairchild, when you are superhuman, you can’t get your haircut, shave, masturbate, shake hands, engage in oral sex, hold hamsters or milk cows. “God No! Not milking cows! How will I live!?” And, “if you are a woman, your breasts will become very, very large. Unrealistically, ‘pubescent-boy-fantasy’ large, in fact. This is the curse of the super female.” In the last of the three stories in this chapbook, Fairchild speculates on the “human chemical addiction” called love. He compares “making love to the experience of eating a bowl of cold breakfast cereal.” And he cautions, “You really shouldn’t be, er, belching, after oral sex.” Very enlightening.
chapbook / publisher: Green Lamp Press / main creator: R.B. Fairchild / $3 / 586 McLeod St., Apt. 2, Ottawa, ON K1R 5R3