Get Well Soon

Somebody needs to put this line on a T-shirt: “Everything I need to know I learned from my mental hospital inmates.” Julie relates her bizarre and intimate adventures as a young girl in a mostly male mental hospital. The story is highly personal, but far from anything resembling melodrama. Instead, Julie adds just the right amount of smart-ass sarcasm with moments like; “I once went to a gastroenterologist who stuck his finger up my butt and gave me pills for Irritable Bowel Syndrome. They didn’t do shit.” Her many references to pop culture are also effectively fitting: “Every goddamned inkblot in the Rorschach Test reminded me of that piece of evil left-over in the toaster-oven at the end of the movie Time Bandits.” What is most original and gripping is how she leaves beautiful and subtle hints of sexual desire between herself and the other inmates. “There was a time before getting older, before sex came, when tension was enough-. We stood straight, with our arms at our sides, hands low, out of sight- I touched the nearest hand. A touch was returned.” There is also a cute fortune telling bonus on the back cover; “you will find true love, or a missing sock.” I say go and find this zine. (Audrey Gagnon)

perzine, #1, 24 pgs, Julie Halpern, $1, P.O. Box 6074, Buffalo Grove, IL, 60089-6074, [email protected]

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